


Boots. EVIL Boots.

by OffCenter



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-16
Updated: 2015-06-16
Packaged: 2018-04-04 17:19:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4146147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OffCenter/pseuds/OffCenter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Boots! Evil mutilated American cowboy boots!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Boots. EVIL Boots.

**Author's Note:**

> Written for my friend K.

The dust had settled, the Sontarans were on the run, and River wasted no more time. She spun, stalked over to her father, and demanded, "What in the name of sanity have you got on your _feet_?"  
  
Rory looked down at the ornate boot sandals he'd found online. As soon as he'd seen them, he'd decided he'd wear them the next time the Doctor told him to dress as a Roman. He looked up as River and grinned. "I know they're not authentic, but they're pretty comfortable," he managed just before Amy tackled him to the ground.  
  
"They're evil. Evil _mutilated_ cowboy boots," she said as she and River each removed one. "Evil mutilated _American_ cowboy boots!" She grimaced at the one in her hands before dropping it into the spare carryall that River offered and wiping her hands on her jeans.  
  
The TARDIS materialised just then, and Amy pulled Rory up and kissed him. "I'll buy you new shoes. Proper shoes. Sandals, even. But never wear those again!"  
  
Rory kissed her back and agreed. After all, he'd really only wanted to see what River would do when she saw them.

***

River had _meant_ to come back and destroy them later when she'd tossed the boots into the massive closet; she really had. It wasn't until some time later that she realised she'd forgotten.  
  
Wibbly wobbly didn't even begin to describe River's experience with time and the Doctor, so she wasn't really sure how long it had been when he appeared to take her to their picnic wearing the same abominations.  
  
"And they were just there, waiting for me! I think they're cool. Never much saw the point of sandals before, but these are cool! Aren't they cool?" His eyes were shining and he looked pleased as Punch. "They're like, like, like, _Roman cowboy boots_! And they're cool! I mean, no offense to Rory, but Romans, not so cool usually. But these are cool!"

River didn't have the heart to shoot them; it would be too much like kicking a puppy. Instead she smiled at her husband. "Yes, my love, very cool. Just as cool as you."  
  
And it wasn't even a lie.

(Later, after he'd gone back to his regular boots, she 'ported the terrible things onto a random cruiser on a planet they were visiting. She very carefully avoided seeing the name of the ship. She really had no idea where they went. Really.)

**Author's Note:**

> These are the boots: http://dangerousminds.net/comments/the_worst_shoes_on_the_fcking_planet_cowboy_sandal_boots


End file.
